Making wishes.

Today we took a little drive into Oregon City and visited the historic John McLoughlin house. They have this beautiful water fountain made in the 1800's and Elijah insisted on making a wish. Daddy gave him a couple coins, and to my surprise Elijah turned toward the fountain and threw the coin in and said, "a wish for Mommy." It really warmed my heart that my 3 years old would take his first wish coin and make a wish just for me. I have a feeling whatever he wished for Mommy will come true.
 This photo will forever be dear to my heart.

Crane Family Garden 2012

Kyle, Elijah are enjoying beautiful summer months here in Oregon.. It's so special as a family being back at our garden watching the little seedlings we planted turn into fresh veggies, peppers, pumpkins and more. This year we planted a pole bean Teepee Elijah says, "butterflies live in it." I like to think they do too.

15 years.

January, 10 1997 was the last time I spoke to my sweet Mom before she passed away. She was a healthy 53 yr old woman that went to bed on that windy winter evening and never woke up. I was barely 20 years old and had my whole world collapsed. I learned at a very young age that life is precious and don't take the ones you love for granted, my life would never be the same again. I had to rebuild and go through a series of life challenges,lessons and mistakes to grow into the person I am today. I didn't have my Mother there physically to tell me what to do...I had to figure it out on my own, with prayer and an intuitive heart guiding me along the way. I also have had many angels (friends and family members.) who have helped guide me . A Mother's love is so beautiful powerful and strong. My Mom wasn't perfect but she loved me and my sister's with every ounce of her being. Now that I am a Mother myself I realize how strong and deep that love is. You want to protect your child from life's painful lessons, but you can't. As my sweet boy grows I have to remind myself daily to let him live and make decisions for himself even at the tender sweet age of 2. For I have learned life is a daily series of decisions and if you don't feel confident to make them for yourself it can be pretty hard to live a authentic happy life. I am so thankful for this beautiful life I have been given.

So on this 15 year anniversary of my Mom's passing I wanted to give her a big hug and share my gratitude.

Thank you Mom. Thank you for loving me and teaching me to make decisions for myself even when it scared the hell out of you. Thank you for giving me the tools to live my life in a good way. I miss you so much but know you are watching us, guiding us, protecting us and smiling down upon us each and everyday. I miss you... I miss Grandma...Grandpa. But as the sun is starting to come out as I type this little message after a morning of fog. I can feel you all around me.

I love you.

Your Daughter "#4",

Cory

Happy New Year!

As I sit here typing I am surrounded by a sweet naked 2 1/2 year old who has decided to go on nap strike today, a 90 pound sleeping lab ( who has decided to use my feet as a bed.), my sweet husband eating the last of the take out Thai food we decided to order. It's a nice peaceful evening in our household, besides the fact I'm nursing a very icky cold. This has been a very hard cold/flu season for our household. I keep praying we are done for the season and then another diabolical illness rears it's evil head. Having a 2 1/2 year old in preschool brings a lot of immune building bugs into a home. I am 35 years old and I'm obviously still building up mine- go figure?!

Today is the last Friday of 2011. I sit in wonderment as to what 2012 will bring. I have so many goals- unfinished business, ideas and deadlines dancing in my head. Dreams that I wish I would bring to life. I have been fighting a lot of weird anxiety and panic attack issues the last year. It's been absolutely awful to say the least. I feel as time ticks on I am feeling the pressure to get things moving. I have always been a fairly calm person. I haven't been one to worry over life's little challenges but being a Mommy has opened me up (wide open) and sometimes it's hard to turn everything off. Being a Massage therapist and helping others tap into their parasympathetic nervous system- you think I would have all the tools... think again. When you are going all the time... it's hard to turn off. So this coming year I have decided to really work on being still and quieting my mind with the art of meditation and prayer. Taking care of self is such an important ritual. I have been preoccupied with loving my baby- I lost sight of nurturing myself. I know it will only make me a better mother, wife, friend, sister and daughter if I start taking care of myself the way I should.

Praying 2012 bring all of us good health, happiness, love and peace.

CC

Crane Family Photo shoot August 2010

We had some beautiful professional family photos taken a couple weeks ago at one of our favorite places, our local community garden where we have an 18X20 garden plot. We love getting our hands dirty as a family. Growing veggies, pumpkins, peppers, herbs and flowers is so much fun. My husband has an extremely green thumb and is teaching Elijah and I a lot. We try to help Daddy as best we can. Which usually entails Mommy running around after Elijah while Daddy tends to the garden. Our little 2 year old does love getting the shovel out and watering with his little watering can.

"Teaching children about the natural world should be seen as one of the most important events in their lives."

 

 

 

Mommy needs a cleaning fairy!

I haven't blogged in almost a month- yikes! I should be doing dishes, vacuuming and get the house clean while Elijah takes his daily nap but I felt like blogging instead... not surprising...Although I love a clean house- I just don't feel like cleaning these days. I so look up to my friends who have a professional clean team come to their house and keep everything sparkly fresh. Someday when the stars align perfectly and we have some extra money in our budget a cleaning fairy will be my first request! Actually a new car and a bigger living situation should probably be on the top of that list but as of this moment the cleaning fairy sounds a lot better to me.

So we have had some big changes in our household! I started my new job about a month ago (hence the no blogging.) I actually really like this new job. I get to work with a very good friend, the office is totally organized (which is a step up from my last place of employment) and I get free dental care which is needed for me and the family. I will have to say though, It HASN'T been easy leaving my sweet boy 3 days a week for 11 hour days :(. The first week I cried a few times...only in the car on my way to work or on my way home. I was strong and didn't show anyone else the tears but the flood gates did open up a time or two because I missed him so much. I don't know how other mommies go back to work so soon after giving birth. I guess you do what you have to do to provide for your family but geesh--it's sooo hard! The long 11 hour days have been a lot to get used to! The early mornings literally kicked my butt at first! I must say- coffee has been a blessing! We have been fortunate to have sweet grandma and auntie watch our little dude the last month- but they both start work and school next week! So this is a prelude to our next big adventure of the month... FINDING DAYCARE! Let me tell you the process was a bit intense. We checked out several different places and had 1 & 1/2 hour meetings with all of them. We finally met the perfect match and I know our little E will be in good hands!

Oh and of course life is a series of unexpected events...our jeep broke down week 2 of starting the new job. Just a $500 fix :(. It would've been more but thank god for Papa Crane. We we're hoping to go to California in October but that plan has been squashed by Mr. Jeep Cherokee himself :(. I will never understand why these small expensive disasters always happen at the worst possible times. Ha ha, I will try not to dwell but serisouly?!

Anyhoo, my cleaning fairy never showed while I blogged...ha ha...looks like I will be the one scrubbing dishes sinks and toilets on my mommy ship today!

"When are you going to have another baby?!"

I've decided to blog on this topic because it's a question that has been asked by many as of late. It doesn't matter where I go or what I am doing but it seems since Elijah has turned 1 this question is in high demand by complete strangers. So... this is what I should've said to the lady at my local bank- I was pregnant for 9 months ( I threw up at least 3 times a day for the first 4 1/2 months of it), had a surprise C-section after 18 1/2 hours of induced labor without pain medication, breast fed for a year+ and I am just now feeling like I am getting this parenting thing down maybe it's because Elijah has started to sleep at least 8 hours a night (coincidence? I think not!) and just when I am trying to feel physically some what "normal" again this question pops up.

I know- I am definitely not a spring chicken, I wish I had more time to decide on bringing another child into this world but I also know my age and I know we will need to make that decision soon since my window for fertile fresh eggs (this is what I call it as of late!) is running out. I would love to have another baby- I would also love a little more time to enjoy our beautiful sweet 15 month old baby boy! I would also like to drink alcohol, have a double shot of espresso daily, eat sushi, play contact sports (kidding) and have an option to indulge when I see fit for at least a year. On top of all of my selfish mommy wants- tee hee, I have been offered a job that I will need to take to support our family funds. It's only 2-3 days a week and let me tell you child care isn't cheap! It literally takes a village to raise a child but that village needs to get paid! So having another baby at this point would be financial suicide. I guess that's a bit dramatic but it's true.

So we are still not sure when the stork will be knocking on our door...anyone else have thoughts on this?